My name is Kristen….. and I am an Idol-addict

I love countdowns. 17 days until Christmas, 117 until my 22nd birthday (frightening), and finally and most importantly, 38 days until Ryan Seacrest inaugurates season 7 of American Idol.

It’s hard to believe 6 months have already passed since Jordin Sparks swept past Blake Lewis to take the crown in America’s most popular reality program. Every week Jordin sparkled with huge talent and tremendous height. Literally. Next to her, Ryan looks like a white Gary Coleman, with a much less funny catch phrase.

Jordin’s self-title debut hit shelves on November 20th. I’m a HUGE fan of “No Air” featuring Chris Brown, and her single “Tattoo” which impressively hit #11 on Billboard Thursday. She debuted in 10th place her first week, and although that’s much lower than past idols, the quality of her singles point toward tremendous staying power.

Jordin is fabulous, but let’s be honest, I’ve been a proud Blaker Girl since week two of last years competition. That week Bothell native Blake Lewis raced off the starting line with Keane’s “Somewhere only we know,” and America’s hearts collectively melted. Exhibit A. my heart. Exhibit B. the popular facebook group “Blake Lewis Makes Me Melt.”

I’ve always believed that he has the ability to make music like nothing on the radio and create a whole new Blakealicoius genre. On December 4th he proved this destiny through “Audio Day Dream.” My first impression, “umm, this is pop music…..” My second thought, “oh yeah, I love pop music!!!”

Blake’s debut is wonderful, however it’s not “like nothing on the radio,” in fact it’s like a lot of things on the radio. On some tracks I would call it Switchfoot meets Savage Garden, on others it’s Prince meets OTown. I even occasionally hear a little spurt of early ‘Nsync and feel some modern vibes from the likes of Hellogoodbye and Snow Patrol. It’s a hodge podge album, a “mixed tape,” as he calls it, with influences from those current stars as well as old timers. In fact, 1929′s “Puttin’ on the Ritz” inspired the dancetastic “Gots to get ‘em.” Wrap your mind around all those musicians and genres, throw in some Beat-boxing, and you’ve got “Audio Day Dream” in a nutshell.

I thought A.D.D would change pop music, much like Timbaland and Timerlake have done in the last year with electronic influences, but it does not. Instead it gives a new spin on whats already been done. Blake certainly proves his musical finesse and delivers on some amazing tracks that have hit potential. Check out “Know my Name” featuring Lupe Fiasco, “How Many Words,” or the anthem of the season, “I Got U.”

iPod showdown:
Blake Lewis: 32 plays
Jordin Sparks: 25 plays
Winner: Me

This idol-addict is satisfied with 2007 but can’t wait for 2008. Who isn’t pumped to watch Paula on qualudes, Randy say “Yo, Dawg,” and Simon and Ryan overtly flirt for the cameras???? Tuesday January 15th will be a great day. A great great day. Just 38 more and counting….

Note to Ryan: “Whatcha talkin bout Willis??????” beats “And this is American Idol” everytime.

That too-full-but-oh-so-happy feeling

 

Today we give thanks… for about five minutes. Then we dive into third helpings of mashed potatoes and devour one too many slices of pumpkin pie. I’m talking about concentrated indulgence. Who can resist the unique flavors and time-tested consistency of each and every dish; from the kick in our sausage stuffing, to the new twist on apple pie, and of course the always delicious “green stuff?” For 21 years I’ve had the same thought, “that green stuff looks disgusting,” but each year, time and again, I end up relenting, “what IS this, and why is it soooo amazing???”

I think the varied traditions and new innovation of a modern Thanksgiving feast fits in well with mainstream music. First of all, there are a lot of Turkeys out there. (Sean Kingston????) We’re also seeing a lot of musicians bringing fresh people to the table, from different cultures and with different experiences to put together completely new and delicious sounds. For this, the ears of America and the world are very thankful.

I for one will try a helping of anything once. How else do you get to taste that new twist in the apple pie? For me this month its “As I Am” from Alicia Keys. Her music, inspired, this new album, amplified brilliance. She takes her vocals to an alternate level without leaving her core fans behind. Her hit, “No One,” even played during a set at a Dub Reggae night I recently attended. She’s pop, she’s soul, she’s jazz, she’s reggae. You can’t put your finger on the secret ingredient, but it is tasty.

This afternoon I saw the “green stuff” waiting in the fridge and I frowned. I was sure it was going to taste terrible, as always I was wrong. I feel the same way about T-Pain. I want to hate him SO bad. His voice is always computer enhanced and not all that unique or interesting, but the songs he collaborates on are surefire hits and more catchy than the autumn flu. Right now I’m digging his work on “Kiss Kiss,” with Chris Brown, “Good Life,” with Kanye West, and “Baby Don’t Go” with Fabolous. Like the initial turnoff of a dish that looks like fluffly sewage, T-pain seems awfully unsavory, but goes down real smooth.

I am feverishly looking forward to the full swing of Christmas. I already have my old favorites by my side, Wham’s “Last Christmas,” and Mariah Carey’s “All I want for Christmas is You.” I wouldn’t bet against “Love Actually” set to repeat in my DVD player. I also bring with me the new tastes and flavors I’ve explored during these fall months and those dropping just around the corner. Blake Lewis’ debut hits stores as advent calendars start counting down, and I have ADD just thinking about “Audio Day Dream.” The sound is totally unexpected. Like bringing a red curry to your grandma’s Thanksgiving feast. Its going to take over what Timbo and Kanye started this summer and bring pop music into a prolonged stage of euro-pop-dance-late 80′s- early 90′s-throwback anthems. Yum.

Each Thanksgiving I feel free. Free to bask guiltlessly in that too-full-but-oh-so-happy feeling. Free to purchase four weeks of Starbucks red cups while listening to Warm 106.9 Christmas classics. Free to indulge in my favorite artists and wander upon new ones breaking into the mainstream. Which artists will be back to see next year’s Thanksgiving? Who will be vetoed faster than overcooked yams?

I know only two things, 1. I hate overcooked yams. 2. There’s a piece of apple pie waiting for me in the kitchen. I’d better go eat that while I rock out to some Alicia Keys.

Happy Thanksgiving! Let’s indulge.

Hey MTV: Play More Videos!

Well….. she finished.

That’s all I can say about Britney’s lackluster appearance at Sunday’s MTV Video Music Awards. It was more like a lazy walk-through in her underwear and the worst hair extensions known to man than a performance. Usually a performer bothers to lip-sync, or god forbid actually sing. Before the show, another new song leaked and it is fierce, but without some effort at the gym, hair salon, and with her psychiatrist Brit won’t even make it to her own Nov 13th release date.

Also dropping in November is the new Alicia Keys. She actually showed up for work last night bringing down the house to her single, “No One.” Another highlight came from Chris Brown’s Michael Jackson-esque routine across a sick stage made out of the audience tables. You know the VMAs suck when the best part is whats UNDER the performer’s feet. Chris, however, killed it.

The idea for this year’s awards was good. Move them to Vegas, party hard in the suites and gamble away the money from this summer’s arena tour. Let me tell you I’d have given my right pointer finger to attend JT & Timbo’s Southern Hospitality party. JT was the big man of the night. He walked away with two moonmen and closed the show that Brit barely opened with style. He even took a jab at MTV, challenging them to play more videos and less “Simpsons” (aka Ashlee and Jessica) reality shows. Ouch. Especially since the stars of “The Hills” presented him with the award. Now that’s funny. Take a cue Ms. Silverman.

Hot: JT, Timbo, Nelly Furtado, Kanye West, Chris Brown, Alicia Keys.

Not: BRITNEY, Sara Silverman, Rihanna (although she rocked out to “Shut Up and Drive” and her dress was to-die), Nicole from PCD, L’il Mama, and last but certainly not least…..the MTV VMA’s 2007.

Is Crazy back “In the Zone?”

First of all it should be stressed that one can never underestimate Britney Spears’ uncanny ability to sabotage her career.

Having said that, save major meltdown #574 the artist formerly known as Crazy is poised to have an excellent autumn. After repeated listening, “Gimme More,” is wildly contagious. I love it! It’s “In the Zone” – “Toxic” Britney reinvented. Though this is just the beginning, I have a feeling Danja and B could be the new Timbo and JT….. Ok, that’s impossible, but they could come close.

“Cold As Fire” also leaked last week, and though the chorus is a little irritating, ten points for innovation. What it lacks in lyrics it makes up for in style. (Sort of like Hilary Duff’s “Gypsy Woman“) Britney seems to have somehow developed a new dance-tastic sound in between serving her mother with papers and peeing with the door open at the OK Magazine shoot.  Anyone else assume her comeback would consist of recycled PCD material and scores of stripper poles???

One thing’s for sure, the public is hungry for the former queen of pop to regain her throne. By Friday “Gimme More” had already jumped to #80 on radio airplay. The Hot 100 will be a steeper climb, but I can see this hit-in-the-making breaking into the top ten in September.

I’m watching two key indicators on the Brit comeback. 1) She performs the single on next Sundays VMAs and doesn’t collapse on stage in her own craziness. She doesn’t even have to kill, just finish. 2) She makes some kind of amends with her family. Not Kev, I’m talking about Lynn. I feel like she needs her mama to remind her that she’s fit to perform at madison square garden, not the trailer park social.

“It’s Britney bitch.” Welcome back.

MUSICmakers

Jordin Sparks: “Tattoo” is terrific! Blake Lewis has the pizzaz but the American Idol winner has sure got pipes. The 17 year old released her debut single to radio stations yesterday and it’s simplistically catchy. Reminiscent of “Walk Away,” by Kelly Clarkson Paula Deanda, this harmless debut will likely walk-its-way to the mid-teens of the Hot 100 and stall like its musical predecessor. Love the single, but I think Jordin should go a little more country, and a little less Disney. Although God bless Disney.

Britney Spears: Mousketeer turns comeback kid??? The former queen of pop is slated to release her first single next week since 2005′s “Do Something.” “Gimme More” is up-beat and produced by Timbaland’s right hand man, Nate (Danjahandz) Hills. No word on the quality, but its unlikely even Timbo himself could help this mess. Word is she’ll be singing at the VMAs… And I use the word “sing” loosely. Lets hope she’s at least lucid. (UPDATE! I LOVE THE NEW SONG)

Amy Winehouse: She was seen walking out of a hotel with the hubby displaying bloody wrists, forehead, and ankles last Friday. Still no rehab… Call me Britney crazy but going on “vacation” isn’t going to do the job. The Caribbean may be better than rehab… But so is staying ALIVE. All American performances have been cancelled so she can “heal” on the beach.

Lance Bass: The question is, do we actually care if Lance likes/hates New York? Does it matter if he thinks the Gotham City has no style? YES. New Yorkers to Lance: YOU have no style. New York magazine adds that Lance, “was indeed the worst dancer in ‘Nsync.” Word.

Rihanna: Congratulations! If it’s true you bagged Shia LaBeouf I admit you do have excellent taste in at least one thing. Love Shia, hate Rihanna, BUT, I love Shia more than I hate Rihanna. Wasn’t “Even Stevens” the GREATEST?

Pete Doherty: Is he in jail or rehab? I can’t keep track. Either way, in a month he’ll still be on drugs, will make up/break up with Kate at least twice, and I’ll remain unable to name a single Babyshambles song.

electro-funk-soul-pop-licious

Insatiable. That’s the only way to describe my appetite for Blake Lewis music. That and undying, never-ending, and incalculable. I literally can’t get enough.

Fortunately his new album, tentatively titled “A.D.D” (Audio Day Dream), is set to drop Thanksgiving weekend. Industry hype sees it poised to turn heads and conquer charts. Blake proved his musical originality and skill in front of 30 million Americans on last spring’s American Idol 6 and we’re all hungry for more of his “electro-funk-soul-pop” sound.

Lewis told chron.com in mid-July, “I’ve got a track that’s very Erasure-sounding, a track that’s Sting-meets-Neverending Story and a track that’s very electro-poppy Depeche Mode. It’s all over the map.” Collaborators include BT, Doug E Fresh, 4th place finisher Chris Richardson, Gnarls Barkley, and Will.i.am.

On August 24th E! Online got the scoop from Arista Records. “Blake has a strong music sensibility and knows who he is and what his music should represent,” said Clive Davis, chairman and CEO of BMG Label Group, Arista’s parent. “His collaborators are all knocked out by him.”

Well all seems gravy in Blake Lewis’ world….. Almost…

Arista also mentioned the album’s producers, S*A*M & Sluggo (who?), Ryan “Alias” Tedder (A Timbaland pal= score), and Jonathan “JR” Rotem. You may know JR from his blink-and-you-missed-it stint as a Britney boy-toy and as a producer on hits for…. prepare yourself….

Rihanna and Sean Kingston!

No wonder I hate them both. They have the SAME producer.

It’s also worth noting that they share him with Kevin Federline. Rotem produced Fed-ex’s “hit” 2006 album “Playing With Fire,” and by “hit” I mean I’d rather hit myself in the face than listen to that garbage-with-a-beat.

Rottem’s work has had chart success, but there’s a precedent for bad music selling well. Have you ever thought of the “Macarana,” by Los Del Rio, and pretty much ANYTHING done by Sean Paul as great music? It’s good for a dance party but void of substance, innovation, taste, unique flavor…

I have faith that Blake’s artistic vision will ultimately prevail above even the most irritating producer’s musings. He’s too talented to be brought down by mediocrity or sell out to the “Beautiful Girl” recipe. Come November, Blake’s serving up a beat-boxing billboard breakthrough that will top the charts on its own merit.

Delicious. I know I’ll be back for seconds.

And you are?!?!?

It seems like today’s music industry is monopolized by heavy hitters. Every other song is a product of American Idol or Def Jam. Refreshingly, the following group of unknowns have hits ranging from#3 to #11 on this week’s Billboard Hot 100 chart. Today I find myself wondering, “who the hell are you??????”

Here’s what I found out:

Keri Hilson: (#3) Featured on Timbaland’s mega hit single, “The Way I Are,” this seasoned songstresss has been in the circuit since 2001, writing and singing backup for a whose-who of modern recording artists including Britney, Usher, and Diddy. Following the road paved by Ne-Yo’s songwriter transition to stardom, she’s currently recording her solo debut with Timbaland and Justin Timberlake. Lucky for her the Timba, JT, and $$$ cycle is the closest to a sure thing since Lindsay, coke, and rehab. Just like the nurses likely said as Lindsay left Promises, “We’ll definitely see her again.”

Plies: (#9) This “Shawty” artist was the original rapper on Akon and Snoop Dogg’s #1 hit “I Wanna Love You,” but lost the gig to Snoop after charges of illegal possession of a weapon hurt his reputation (but not his street cred). The charges were filed after his entourage opened random fire on the audience of a Florida show. With that kind of tendency toward violence he should go on tour with “loose-canon” Akon and we can all collectively NOT attend the show together. Proving that craziness sells (case in point, Britney Spears), Plies’ album debuted at #2 this week, selling just under 100k copies.

Hurricane Chris: (#10) 18 year old Shreveport, Louisiana native, Chris Dooley was inspired by chanting at a DJ Hollyhood Bay Bay concert into molding the phrase “A Bay Bay” into Shreveport’s version of the popular slang “fo sho.” (Somebody please explain the correlation to me…) Apparently ATL’s Collipark got it. He signed the Hurricane to J Records this year, and “A Bay Bay” the single is in the top ten on Billboard. In other news Shreveport calls popular “hyphy” or “crunk” music by the name “ratchet.” WTF?

Soulja boy: (#11) Apparently teenage rappers are the new pink. 17 year old Soulja’s “Crank That” jumped to #11 after only 5 weeks charting. Rapping since the age of 9, Soulja moved from Atlanta to Mississippi to live with his dad and kickstart his career. “I took the hood to where the money was at” he explains. Soulja perfected his sound and returned to his mom at 15 where he too was signed by Mr. Collipark, “I was like I gotta get my momma out of this right here.” He did just that. Of his first performance he says “The show was so crunk that I was worried about doing a wack show.” Ok, wack and crunk I understand. Maybe Soulja could translate for Hurricane??? A Bay Bay.

To recap: Timbo’s taking Keri to the top, Plies is angry like Akon, Hurricane Chris speaks his own language, and Soulja Boy is a momma’s boy.

Let’s get it ratchet!

Not to rain on your parade…

No Perez, “Umbrella” is NOT the song of the summer.

Hey TMZ, when you call it the undisputed summer song of 2007  you’re wrong.

Jeeez

For informational purposes, I’ve provided you with  a short list of 2007 Hot 100 #1 songs that are better (and why):

• “Irreplaceable” Beyonce (addicting, but not irritating)
• “What goes around… Comes around” Justin Timberlake (deliciously spiteful)
• “Say It Right” Nelly Furtado (cool as hell)
• “This is Why I’m Hot” MIMS (simplistic yet true message)
• “Glamorous” Ferge (fabulous and fun)
• “Give it to me” Timbaland (turns my car into a dance hall EVERY TIME)
• “Makes Me Wonder” Maroon 5 (so singable)
• “Hey There Delilah” Plain White T’s (lovely and real)

However it is not the worst song either, “Umbrella” is better than the following 2007 number #1s:

• “Don’t Matter” Akon (blahhh)
• “Girlfriend” Avril (Avril sucks, duh)
• “Buy U a Drank” T-pain (At least Rihanna can spell…)
• “Beautiful Girls” Sean Kingston (RUINED sample of “Stand by Me”)

So from my count it comes in as the 9th “best” song of the year……

And Perez, in my opinion the real song of the summer hasn’t even hit #1 yet:

(no surprise here)

1. “The Way I Are” Timbaland (incredible – incredible – incredible)

 Did I mention it’s INCREDIBLE? (Check out the FRENCH remix!)

surfing the charts

Hot shot Kanye’s “Stronger” is ALREADY up to #6 on the Billboard Hot 100, a dramatic airplay gain from #47 last week. He’s easily poised to enter the top 5 in August like I predicted and then some. I would love to see Timba/Kanye at 1 and 2. The “Stronger” video was nominated for the “video of the year” MTV VMA yesterday. Kanye picked up four nods in total including, “Male Artist of the Year.” Lets hope he loses and goes off like he did at the ’06 MTV Europe Music Awards. Awesome. Set your tivos! (sept 9th)

Carrie’s new tune debuted at #20 on the country charts. No doubt it’s going straight to the top. “So Small” combines the true country soul she displayed in “Jesus Take the Wheel,” and the cross-over mass-market appeal of of “Before he cheats” and wraps it up in a message of “love conquers all.” This song is going to be so NOT small. It’s going to be huge, Jordin Sparks huge.

Timba’s “song of the summer” raises one notch to #4 and pushes Sean Kingston’s gf to #5 which brings me great joy. Its all about the small victorys in life.

Sean, however, is still #1. His  second single also debuted well at #23 and his album his stores this week in the top ten. This is wrong on so many levels. It’s like someone proclaiming britney spears is a sane person, that would be a stupid thing to say. Sean’s success is just that, stupid…. Also silly, needless, dumb, wrong, unnecesary…..

manic music monday

Hate it or love it

I love Daft Punk, and now in association I love Kanye West. I’m obsessed with the dance-tastic “Stronger,” off his next album “Graduation,” Kanyes’ europop follow-up to “Late Registration.” If you’re going to sample, might as well sample something fabulous like Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger.” I predict it will climb into the top 5 of the Billboard Hot 100 this August.

Anybody else hate “Beautiful Girls” by Sean Kingston? He is the male Rihanna, but with even LESS talent. Jurys out on who is skankier. Maybe they’ll get together and make the worst album of all time. (Tidbit: Rihanna was born in 1988 and Sean in 1990! Doesn’t that make you feel really really old?)

Making Music History This Fall…

New Timbaland pairings in the works! The mega-producer/platinum-artist can hand pick his match-ups these days. Have you ever heard of a certain songstress named Celine? How about Madonna? Timba’s in the studio with both. I’m more excited for these hits-in-the-making than as I was for ‘Nsync’s “Pop” release in 2001. Oh yes, we’re talking boyband-frenzy kind of anticipation.

Carrie Underwood’s first single off her sophomore effort, “So Small” (and also her first writing credit!) is everything a country song should be. I see it beating out Chesney for the top-spot on the country charts this summer, and crossing over into the top 20 of the popworld on the Hot 100. Can you say multiplatinum five times fast? Her October release is going to KILL.

Blake Lewis. Just wait. That’s all.

Last Words

Timba’s “Way I Are,” is THE song of the summer. Period. The end. No question. Fact.